What Not to Say When Your Ex Says, "I'm writing a book"

The following lines, however hilarious or justified you think they are, may indicate bitterness.

- "First Webster, now you Lisa Marie? Can't anyone I shared a bed with just keep quiet?"
- "So it has an unreliable narrator?"
- "I'm surprised Satan needs a ghostwriter"
- "I think, 'So, You're a Bitch" will definitely fill a niche in the market."
- "Can I be victim #4?"
- "I thought authors needed to be fully literate?"
- "You know, when you became Mrs. Canseco, you signed away your rights to your side of the story."
- "What's that? I couldn't hear you over all the LYING!"
- "Oh? Will you also leave it for your high school sweetheart?"
- "Don't you think the print industry has enough problems already?"
- "Meh."
- "Jesus, just say you need some cash and don't bullshit me."
- "Awesome! I think it's time for Jezebel to get someone understanding to retell her story."
- "Whatever, but you should know that I only lied to you about sleeping with Madonna because I was lying to myself."